Goth Ilk: Honestness

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Honestness

Being open about beliefs and honesty is a wonderful method to avoid compromising conditions. As a person with regular beliefs, I do not want to be involved in an activity that will embarrass me or go against my beliefs. I also do not want to betray the trust of people who trust me as a friend.

There are many obstacles within and outside the Goth Scene when socializing with new, interesting people. I am not the kind of person who has to know everything about a person. In fact, it seems strange when people think demanding every possible moment of everyday is mandatory in establishing trust. This is marriage and overly demanding for marriage.

When socializing, everyone provides information to begin understanding a person as an individual not another cutout character. It is important to remove assumptions and discuss personal experiences. Experiences range and while feeling it is better to remain shallow while others expose terrifying experience so others will act appropriately. As a relationship continues boundaries develop. It is important to know personal ethics.

Not wanting to be snobbish, there are signs to know if someone will be a close friend. Talking about the Goth House, this is only one limitation. I try to remain open-minded, yet it is perfectly okay to limit conversation to open forum whether on the internet or in a public meeting room. Get a glass of ice tea. Go to drum circles. Watch live bands and have fun with like minded people. It makes life better and readjusts perception to a fulfilling reality.

In the city, seeing people and being seen, I became involved in human rights and environmental issues. People have a certain look and for years I found a group of friends that I still respect. As time went by it became more apparent their associates restricted conversation and suspicion arose. While remaining a friend, gossip and other elements begin to filter in, suddenly I have to prove myself. Luckily, I knew my actual stance on issues.

One night a new woman was introducing herself to everyone. I met her a few times before. She was given the stage so everyone can know her as a person. She told a story about sugaring construction equipment to prevent leveling a portion of the forest near her hometown. Luckily, I already knew damaging equipment is not the proper method to protect forests. The land must host an endangered species or other meaningful reason to rezone the land. In addition, damaging machinery contributes to unnecessary air population to replace parts so they can level the forest at a later time.

My dismay over the conversation guarantees I will never know anything more than hearsay. I will never find myself on vacation hopping across the shallowest part of a stream to sugar gas tanks and disappear into the woods. As hearsay, there is nothing report. She could be bragging, making up stories, exaggerating a story about another person or claiming to do something she only saw in a film.

Even when conversing with other Goths it is important to know personal ethics. I do not want to betray the trust of anyone even strangers. Especially when talking to another group close friends or not, this creates an image with everyone in their group about all Goths.

We had a good run getting to know each other and they are real people to me. Even if a shallow relationship, it is wrong to try to harm people who are not trying to harm you. It is ruthless to gain someone's trust only to tear them down. When approaching someone else, they will be and should be suspicious of a potential traitor.

It is difficult in youth to know what is and is not okay. It is the time when we begin to develop an idea of what we think about right or wrong. Not knowing creates complications, yet the only way to fix this it is to acquire experience. Do not feel bad. Let it be known you are young. Too young to do this or that, blame parents. Perhaps it is getting too late. It is important to go home and sleep because of school or a volunteer job tomorrow. These excuses allow time to reflect on a potential activity that will be embarrassing later.

Interpersonal relationships are difficult. A handful of strategies prevent unseemly and potentially dangerous conclusions that will be embarrassing. In fact, my Mother said I should never do anything I will embarrass me later.

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